All healing is restoration to wholeness, whether it’s our microbiome, a forest, an ocean, or within the infinite ocean of our hearts and minds.

The first time I spiritually realized this in an experiential way, not just as a nice ‘idea,’ was in 2005 when I was at a meditation retreat with (the late) Michael Tamura.

As some old energy cleared out of my space, enough for me to notice it with my conscious awareness, I became momentarily stuck on that energy, as a feeling.  I said to Michael, “I feel like I’m losing my mind. Am I okay?”

It was a passing feeling, yet because it brought up fear, it felt ‘real.’ My nervous system was integrating my rapid inner growth, and hadn’t quite caught up yet to recognize that I was breaking free from an old comfort zone so that I could see more clearly what was aligned for my purpose. It was exactly the growth I needed, that I had chosen, yet as it unfolded, it caused a tiny earthquake to ripple through my mind!

Michael laughed with enormous compassion, and he said, “You can’t lose anything that’s truly yours.”

As soon as he said that, I laughed too, and released what seemed like a thousand subtle messages I’d been unconsciously holding, that had lived in my space for long enough that I assumed they were ‘really me.’ Yet nothing could be farther from the truth, and the experience of that guided self-healing opened a new space of freedom, joy and authenticity.

In that moment of expansion, I saw how intensively I’d been healing so many people all my life, on overdrive. In the process, I had absorbed a ‘variety-pack’ of energy that I was trying to negotiate with, to ‘feel okay’ or override it.  All that subtle negotiating creates stress, second-guessing your inner knowing, or self-criticism. All I really had to do was acknowledge that quite literally, I had ‘nothing’ to lose!

This expanded my awareness as a teacher, as I recognized how powerful our growth can be when we allow ourselves the space to enthusiastically engage in it experientially, without resisting what is ready to release so that we can reset and restore. This synchs us up so we can integrate with ease and plenty of laughter on our journey.

This healing also helped me to clearly see the same kind of energy in others so that I could guide them in their self-healing and integration.

When we do the ‘inner work’ of healing ourselves, which can show up in a multitude of different forms as a tiny earthquake that ripples through our mind, what we experience is more freedom, joy, awe, purpose, laughter, intuition, creativity, and an experiential realization of wholeness.

What would you like to restore within yourself that fills you with purpose or joy, or inspires your creativity, helps you grow, or makes you feel a sense of awe and wonder?

by Gwyneth R Flack, M.A.

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